Do You Believe in Miracles?
by denial187
Summary: Bella Swan has been criticized since Elementary School, she cried in every dark corner that she could possibly find. But when she met him, he wouldn't let her. He'd comfort her best way possible, and it always worked. She always wondered why he cared. AH
1. Preface

A/N: This is my first fanfic so plz read and review and tell me what you think =)

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN THE CHARACTERS OR ANYTHING THAT IS FAMILIAR FROM TWILIGHT. ALL THE GRACE AND GLORY BELONGS TO Stephenie Meyer.

Song: Look After You, The Fray.

-x-

**BPOV**

It was always different from what I'm experiencing now. People made fun of me since Elementary. People called me ugly, stupid, dumb, a bitch... I never had the strength to do anything back to them. I'd just keep walking, trying to hold back tears and cry later in my room, or I'd yell at them saying, "JUST LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!", and then continuing my route and listening to their laughter.

I know, I'm tired of everyone telling me all the time. I'm ugly, and it's as simple as that. I'll never have a boyfriend who'll love me for who I am on the inside. All I do is ask why, though. God hasn't given me _my _miracle _yet. _And that's my question: why, God? Why isn't my miracle here yet? You've given everyone else theirs, so why not me?

But...when I met _him, _it all changed, though I knew he'd never like me. He took the time to talk to me, to look _through _me and _befriend _me. He became my best friend, my lover.

Like right now, he's my lover because he's making love to me. It wasn't for the sex though, it's for the love. He's not a terrible person; he really cares.

The thought makes me smile. We meet in Middle School, now here we are, fresh out of High School to get married. Just like my father, Charlie. And just after that, it was time to go start school again in college.

Any choice he wanted that sounded right, I'd agree with him. Just like when he proposed to me. Just like when he held me.

Just like when he made love to me.

My friend, my lover, my Jasper.

My life.

-x-

A/N: Thank you for reading =) Please review.


	2. Where am I?

A/N: Okay, just to let you know I might not be able to update regularly because I have a baby brother and a worrisome mother....just to let you know.

Song: Done All Wrong, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club

-x-

Hi. I'm Isabella Swan. But...I really prefer Bella, if you don't mind. If you do, oh well don't talk to me. My father and I have been living together since my mother, Renee, died. She died of a motorcycle accident when I was six. From then on, my father hasn't touched a motorcycle.

Gosh, he was so careful. He told me that I was never ever in my _life _going to ride a motorcycle. He is so protective.

I loved him for that, though.

I sighed as I poured the pancake mix into the pan. A usual father would never let a nine year old cook on the stove, but in this case, I'm a better cook than him. My mother would always tell me how good a cook I was.

"_For a five year old, you're a pretty good damn cook." She chuckled as she wiped her hands._

_I gasped. "Mommy, you just cursed! You cursed, you cursed!"_

_She laughed, shake her head a little. "I guess I owe a dollar in the swear jar, huh?"_

_I nodded, and it just made her laugh even more._

"_But really, Bella. You can cook lasagna as good as me. I'm glad I taught you, I could use a break."_

_The thought made me smile. Cooking like a big girl. "Thanks Mommy!" I ran to give her a hug, glad that she trusted me._

"Bella? Bella!"

I shot my head up and looked around. "Huh, what?" I looked down to see the pancakes nearly burned. "Oh! Sorry, Dad." I scooped up the pancakes and put them on a plate, and then put the plate on the table.

"It's okay, Bells." He pulled out one of the tacky chairs and sat in it. "I was you, but that was only once. You're just nervous about your first day here in Forks Elementary."

I got the syrup and sat down with him. I sighed. "I suppose..."

"Make this your best first day ever, okay? Fourth grade is gonna be nice, Bells. Trust me."

"I suppose..." I repeated. I really hated being the "New Girl" at school. It was so ridiculous.

"And you'll be ten soon. What do you wanna do for your birthday?" my father asked.

"Uh..." Well, I really don't know. I hate birthdays _so much. _It's just the getting older part... "I wanna go see mom..."

He stiffened in his chair and exhaled, finishing the piece of pancake in his mouth. "Sure," he said, unsure of wanting to go there.

"Thanks, Dad," I said, smiling and popping a piece of pancake in my mouth.

-x-

"You okay, Bells?" my Dad asked me. We were in his cruiser now. I didn't want to voice how embarrassing it was, and so I didn't.

"Sure, uh...a little scared and nervous..._mostly _scared and nervous."

He made a throaty chuckle as we pulled up in front of the school. I saw the other kids filling in the school. I sighed and sunk deeper in the passenger seat.

He laughed and nudged my shoulder. "Aw, cheer up, Bells. You're gonna like it. I promise."

"Sure." I got out with my backpack, shut the door and waved as he drove off. I could feel my skin getting kind of warm, hot actually. "Oh man," I whispered to myself, shaking my head at the large amount of people filling in the school.

Hesitantly, I walked to the double doors that had the "Main Entrance" sign above it. Slowly, my hand shaking, I opened the door and walked in. I looked around the white halls, examining the pictures and painting and posters and signs that hung on the pure white walls.

My Dad decided to move to the alien planet at the end of my 3rd grade school year. He never told me why, though.

I quickened my pace as more people starting swarming. I was so scared. I wish I was back in Jacksonville with Mom and Dad and –

"Excuse me, are you new?" a melodic voice asked. I looked up to see someone with reddish-brown hair and fair skin. He had the prettiest smile on his face...and what pretty eyes he had...

"Um...yes? Yes, yes I am new..."

he extended his hand out for me to shake. I took it eagerly. "Well hey, I'm Edward Cullen. My friends call me Edward." Then he added in a flirtatious manner, "So, you wanna kick it sometime? I got candyyyy." Then he bit his bottom lip. I gasped and blushed.

"Hey! What are you doing man?" a different voice asked. My head snapped to the direction the voice was coming from. Gosh...he was so big...and muscular...he _had _to be in the 5th grade. "That is no way to seduce a lady, let alone a new student."

"God, Emmett," Edward groaned. "This isn't even your hallway. This hallway is for 4th graders, obviously."

Emmett shrugged. "So what? Anyway, sweet thing, I gotta box of condoms in my bag right now...wanna go?" He quirked an eyebrow and moved his tongue in fast up-and-down motion.

I gasped. Were condoms for...sex? Oh my gosh, my heart was pounding. I didn't want to do anything with his...colossal self. _Ugh_.

I felt tears streaming down my face as I looked down, watching then fall to the floor.

"See what you did, Emmett? You can't be fast on them like _that."_ I heard a heavy thump, and then heard Emmett say, "Owwwww!".

"Hey," a voice said beside me. I looked up – for the last time hopefully – to the direction of the voice. His voice was smooth and calm...and so was his hair...gosh he was cute, but I'm not good enough for him, anyway. "Are you okay? Or did my two brothers here try to pull a fast one on you?" He grinned lazily, and I smiled back.

"Um...," I started in a shy voice, "They tried to pull a fast one on me. Uh, Emmett here wanted me to have sex with him...and Edward tried persuading me with candy."

"Hmmm," he hummed, and then nodded. "Emmett, Mr. Berty wants you. And Edward, get to class before I tell Dad."

"Fine," they groaned at the same time, and started back to their classes.

"It's okay, it was rough for me on the first day, too. So, whats your name 4th grader?" He smiled after he asked this, probably inside laughter for his private joke.

"Isabella Swan, but I prefer Bella, though." I looked down as I voiced this, as we walked in the direction of my class past all the kids.

"Not a problem. Well, I'm in 5th grade, and my name is Jasper. Jasper Hale." He extended his hand for me to shake it. And I did.

"Pleasure to meet you, Jasper," I said with a smile on my face.

-x-

A/N: Okay everyone...this was chapter one...please review. Thanks =)


	3. Cottontail Rabbits and Hungry Lions

A/N: I just turned 13...and it kinda sucks...I don't know but I'm still here, right?

Song: The Remedy, Jason Mraz

-x-

I knocked on the door with a shaking fist, kinda disappointed that Jasper had to leave me so quickly.

The door opened in a flash, so fast I could have sworn I saw a little flash of lightening.

The man who I assumed as the teacher asked me, "Young lady, may I ask, your name please?"

Hesitantly I stated my name quietly. "Uh... Bella Swan...Isabella Swan. Uh, are you Mr. Banner?"

He smiled brightly at me and said, "Yes I am. Well just a minute. I have to check and make sure you're in my class." He put on his glasses and held the clipboard up in front of him. "Swan, is it?" I nodded, and he took his index finger and started dragging it down the page. "Stanley...Stoke...Stuart...ah here we are. Isabella Swan."

He moved out from the doorway and waved his hand out in front of me, and gesture to walk in.

_Okay Bella, you can _do _this, _I thought to myself.

I took a step forward, walking into the classroom – playing the role of a cottontail rabbit – to a lot of hungry lions, waiting to pounce upon their prey.

Pictures of lions attacking their prey and ribs and red stuff everywhere just intruded my mind.

"Would you like to introduce yourself, Bella?" Mr. Banner asked. I quickly shook my head. "Okay, well, how about you sit...right.........there, right beside Mr. Mike Newton, please. Only if you don't mind."

_Actually, I do mind. _The boy name Mike Newton had brown stuff all over his face, and was eating something under his desk. He was pretty thick, too. I silently shook my head as everyone stared at me. I looked down as the teacher cleared his throat. "Well, Isabella –"

"Bella."

"Well, _Bella, _you can sit right there beside Jacob. He'll help you through the year, but only if you need any."

"Okay," I said as I made my way to sit beside this "Jacob" guy. I felt eyes boring into my back as I walked, but I tried my best to ignore them.

I sat down beside him, loudly dropping my tote on the floor by accident.

Anyway, this Jacob had nice, beautiful long hair. He almost made me want to braid it up. He had black, cold eyes, and russet-brown skin. He was very attractive, but just not _as _attractive as Jasper was.

"Hey, I'm Jacob...you must be the New Girl, obviously. Now, a couple tips of survival for this place. Number 1: Don't walk in the halls without a pass. Some 5th graders might come out of no where and start talking random horse manure about you, they can do this because they have the longest lunch period; number 2: This school is _beyond _rude and _beyond _mean, so don't talk to anyone you _don't _know, or there will be consequences; and number 3: Never wear black unless you're emo, or goth. 5th graders hate black, for some reason."

Wow. I blinked twice. "Has anyone ever thought about telling the principle or something?"

He shook his head and sighed, slouching back in his seat. "Anyone who's ever experienced any of that has _never _told _anyone, _because they knew that the 5th graders would find out and get really angry. That's why I make sure that I have a pass, don't wear black, and don't talk to anyone I don't know. I still have a couple bruises from some dudes hitting on me..."

"Oh my gosh...that's horrible..." I shook my head in disbelief. I wonder if Jasper ever did any of this... I hope he didn't. He was _way _too nice to do something horrible.

All of a sudden, he burst into laughter, throwing his head back and almost falling out of his seat. "I'm only kidding! Every grade has the same lunch period _and _recess time. Boy, did I have you!"

The teacher sent us a pointed glance. "Jacob, I expect you to follow the instructions on the board: Social Studies book, read pages seventeen through twenty. Most of you has had me last year, I expect you all to act like it. As for you, Miss Swan, I want you to do the same. Social Studies text book, pages seventeen through twenty."

"Okay," I said, picking up the thick text book in front of me. It was _so heavy. _But at least I only had to read three pages. When I turned to page seventeen, the chapter was called, "The Start of WWI". I did _not _want to learn about World War One, but apparently, I had to.

Once the whole class was done reading, we started on math.

Oh, I just _love _math. It's my favorite subject.

We were working on multiplication and division. How weird for me that Addition had become more difficult now that I'm very familiar with multiplying.

Mr. Banner wrote problems of both on the chalk board, and he wanted us to solve them. He gave out candy to whoever got them right, and I was one of those lucky people.

After math, we moved on to science. He had to talk about the food chain, and different animals being a carnivore; omnivore; and herbivore.

Then, we learned about mimicking and camouflage, which I don't really see a difference between the two.

After science, it was time for lunch. Gosh, I was so hungry, all I could think about was eating. I grabbed my purse and walked out of the classroom, my head down. I watched as my feet kept disappearing under my white skirt, suddenly feeling someone tap my shoulder.

I turned around to find a smiling Jasper, and I smiled back.

"How was your day so far?" he asked. But before I could respond, someone else answered for me.

"Oh, it was just fabulous, thanks for asking," Emmett said.

"Emmett, can't you tell she's _afraid _of your colossal-ness? I mean, look at her. Every time you come near her, she shakes."

I looked up at Emmett really quickly, then looked back down, and cringed into the arm of Jasper.

"What did you say to her to make her cry?" Jasper asked him.

"I said –"

"Hey Emmett," I flirtatious voice said. I turned to the direction of it, and looking the person up from the toe-showing heels the the blond hair on her head. She waved at him, then continued her steps, swaying her hips in a real attractive way.

Emmett's jaw dropped. "Yo Jasper, what do I do to get a nice honey like _that." _He pointed at the girl, still looking at Jasper.

He shook his head. "Emmett, that's Rosalie. She's as gross and nasty as Lauren Mallory but hey, if you want to be with her then go ahead. Don't say I didn't warn you. Now move, I have to escort Bella to lunch."

We walked past Emmett, on our way to the double doors ahead of us.

"You can sit anywhere you want, but I prefer you sit with me so you know how to survive this school the whole time you're here," he said in my ear. "You have paper and pencil?"

I nodded silently as we moved closer to the double doors.

"Okay. Now, when we walk in here, _do not _look around. That'll make everyone talk about you. Just go straight the the lunch line, okay?"

I nodded again as we paused at the double doors.

"Alright, here we go."

-x-

A/N: I am kinda sick and tired of being home when I wanna be in school...but hey, have no choice 'cause I'm sick... Anyway, review if you feel like and ADD ME AND MY STORY plz...thnx love you all lots =)


	4. Honey buns and tacos? Weird

A/N: **(cough cough]** Still at home sick... I am totally miserable and bored, but I figured your reviews would cheer me up... right?

Song: Draining, Silversun Pickups

-x-

We walked into the bright cafeteria filled with chatter and laughter.

"Just pretend you're my girl, and you won't get talked about," he whispered in my ear as he put his arm around my waist. "Do you mind?" he asked in a whisper.

"Definitely not," I whispered back, smiling. But...I just made it obvious that I liked him...gosh I hoped I wasn't blushing.

"Okay, here are my friends. Let me do the talking. Don't say a word, 'kay?"

I nodded quietly as we approached his friends. "Hey guys."

"Hey Jazz," the three said in unison. Then one said, "This your girlfriend our something?" a boy with small curly hair asked.

"Yeah Tyler. This is my girlfriend. Why does it concern you? Where's yours?"

The other two 'oooohhed' and guffawed, instigating the moment. I blushed and looked down.

"Look now, I was planning –"

"Planning? Dude, how can you plan to get a girlfriend. Man Tyler, you are the worst excuse known to man." Jasper chuckled after he said this, and so did I.

"Yeah yeah, quit your yappin'. Anyway, how did you and whatshername meet?"

"Her name is Bella. I'd greatly appreciate if you called her that."

"Yeah okay well, how did you and _Bella _meet?"

"We met at the dock; we went fishing there a lot, then I finally asked her out. Not a big deal." He simply shrugged. For once, I felt wanted...even though I knew this was make pretend.

"Mhmm. Is that true, Bella?" Tyler asked me.

I blushed and nodded.

"Well how about y'all kiss right here?"

I gasped. Kiss? I've never kissed before... I blushed into Jasper's neck, kind of breathing in his scent. Mmm...he smelled like honey buns and tacos...it almost made me want to lick him and see what he tasted like.

"Jasper please _do something," _I pleaded in a whisper. I didn't want to kiss someone I didn't _know. _

"You guys, she's shy. She won't kiss in front of anyone she doesn't know. This is her first year here; she doesn't know _anybody."_

"Alright then. How about we go in the halls?"

"Tyler, stop trying to get us to do something we don't wanna do. It only makes things worse."

"Okay okay! But...one more suggestion."

Jasper groaned, and I looked up to look at Tyler. "Fine."

"How about you let her kiss your neck?"

...I was almost worried that my eyes lit up, so I just blushed and put my head back in the crook of his neck.

"I said she's _shy. _That's your problem now, Tyler: you don't know when to stop; it's aggravating. And for someone that failed the 5th grade three times. I mean, you're supposed to be in the _7__th__ grade. _Dang, even the 3rd graders are smarter than you. They can divide _decimals _while you're still stuck on multiplication." Jasper shook his head. "You're such a hormonal teenager, Tyler. God."

Tyler stared at Jasper, his mouth in the shape of an 'O' as we went to the lunch line, and his friends still laughed. "I guess we gotta stay like this for a while...only if you don't mind, though."

"Definitely not," I repeated. I think he could tell that I liked him. A lot. "Oh...and I have a question: do you like honey buns and tacos?"

He chuckled, and then asked the cafeteria lady for pizza and mashed potatoes. He turned back to me and said, "Yes...I do. I eat them nearly everyday. Our Dad makes tacos for all of us, but I always eat the most because I love them so much."

"Next," the lady said.

"May I have the same, please?" I said in a quiet voice, and I seemed surprised when she heard what I said.

"Of course." She got a piece of the deformed pizza, and put it on my plate. Then she took the scoop and dumped the mashed potatoes on my plate. "Have a nice lunch."

"Thank you." Me and Jasper walked across the room, to an isolated table with Edward, Emmett, Rosalie, and a little spiked hair girl.

He put his arm back around my waist...you know...make pretend...?

"The spiked hair girl is our sister: Alice. She looks skinny, but she eats more than _Emmett. _And the best part about her: she hates tacos and honey buns." he chuckled, and I smiled and laughed a little once we reached the table.

I sat down after Jasper, and started picking at my pizza.

"So," Emmett began, "You and Bella, huh?"

Edward laughed. "Jazz, you can't be using her like a friggin' china doll to show off to everone. That's just wrong."

Alice smile and chirped a laugh with him. "But I like her Edward. She seems nice."

"But," Jasper said sharply as he cut them off, "we had to do that. You know when someone new looks around, they'll get talked about." Everyone at the table agreed. "Plus, I was her first acquaintance, so I thought she wouldn't mind me bringing her to lunch. She already likes me." he smiled as he said this.

The table gasped, and so did I. I blushed as they stared at me. "How did you know?" I asked.

He snorted. "Oh my god, Bella. It's only obvious." He started eating the sloppy, nasty school pizza.

"Really?" I asked, looking up at him.

He nodded and said, "Mmhm," as he ate the pizza.

I opened my chocolate milk and started drinking it, trying to cool my face down.

"Do I _have _to go to recess after this?"

Jasper, and everyone else, shook their heads.

"You can walk around in the halls and talk if you wanted," Rosalie told me. "Or you can go to your homeroom and draw or whatever, but we can't just stay in here. The custodians have to clean in here."

"Oh...okay then."

Gosh this day was...ri_donk_ulous. It's like what my dad says when he gets off a long day at work.

It's been a helluva day.

-x-

A/N: Just to let y'all know, these are random songs that I picked off my iTunes...for I have an iPod... Anyway, do me a favor? Review please? Thanks 33333.


	5. Saved by the bell, well, kinda

A/N: Still a little sick, but your reviews made me a little BETTER!! Anyway, here's chappie five of this work of art...enjoy it!

Give You My All, Eyes Set to Kill

-x-

"So, now that you know how to survive this blasted school, tell me about yourself. For instance: What's your Dad like?" Jasper asked. We were now walking down the halls of the school as our recess time.

"Um...over protective, but that's why I love him so much: he cares."

"Oh..." he said, though I thought he said it to his self. "My Dad isn't like that. Every other night, he'll go out and go to like a club or something, and get drunk, and my mom...she just gets worried about him. It kinda scares me...and my mom just sits there, and takes all of that..._horse manure _in." He shook his head and bowed it. "I don't really like it." He looked up at me. "Anyway, what's your mom like?"

I halted my steps, and gasped. My mother...she was my _everything. _My best friend...my life trainer. "My mom," I said, my voice breaking. I backed against a wall, and slid down to the floor, crying silently. "My mom," I repeated, sobbing now.

Tears stained the pretty white skirt my father had bought for me this year. I put my head in my hands, kind of frustrated he had to bring my mother into the conversation.

I felt him sit down beside me, rubbing my back. "I didn't mean to bring her up; I'm sorry."

I sniffled. "Well, you couldn't have possibly known...don't blame yourself."

He sighed, and then the bell rang. He got up, and then helped me up, pulling my hand. "You should go to the bathroom and wipe off your face."

I nodded, agreeing with him. As he started back to class I called after him. "Jasper." He turned around to look at me.

"Hmm?"

"Thank you."

He grinned. "Welcome," he said as the hallways began to fill, walking back towards the 5th grade hall.

-x-

After I got out of the girls' bathroom, I walked back towards room four-sixteen. On my way, I accidentally bumped into a girl with dark hair and glasses. "Oh! Um...excuse me."

She turned around, flipping her little black ponytail, and smiled at me. "Oh it's okay. Are you new here?" she asked. I nodded, and she extended her hand out. "Well, I'm Angela Weber, but my friends call me Ange...what's your name?"

I took her hand willingly, glad that I have another acquaintance before the end of the day. "Bella Swan."

"Great. So, who's class are you in?" she asked as we began walking down the hall.

"Mr. Banner's, room four-sixteen."

She smiled a little. I really liked her. She was nice. "I'm in your class. Hmm, I probably didn't notice you when you walked in. I was probably reading my book. See?" She held up a book that was red and blue on the front, and on the back it was red and black, including the summary. "It's called A Darker Dream by Amanda Ashley. This book is just incredible."

I nodded. "You like to read vampire books?" I asked. I mean, it's obvious though, that the title had something to do with Vampires.

"Yeah. They hold my interest. I have the Thirst Series, Vampire Academy Series, Night World Series...you know? But I judge books by title and summary, and cover also."

I smiled. We had something in common. "So do I. I mean, I like reading those kind of books, too."

"Mrs. Swan and Mrs. Weber!" someone yelled. I jumped at the booming voice of...Mr. Banner. Dang, I should've known. "Why are you two walking slow? Speed the pace, we have English left! Unless, ladies, you would like a referral. I don't like it when class time is wasted by people who wants to take their time in the halls."

We obeyed what he said, and quickened our pace, walking to our seats. We immediately started English, talking about Third and First person, Punctuations, and different types of sentences. How they were used, and why they were called what they were called.

Then, we had to read a story silently to ourselves in the English textbook. This is why I hated English: I can't keep up with it. It's not hard, it's just kind of pointless to me...but how else would I talk?

Right.

Thank god, Saved By the Bell like that 1980's TV show with that cute dude with dimples...

I put my notebooks and textbooks in my tote, for our assignments for tonight was to read about Jamestown. I grabbed my tote and purse, walking towards the student pickup area.

But, as I walked, someone's arm slipped around my waist. I looked to my right, to find Jasper smiling at me.

"Remember," was all he said.

"But...my Dad is coming to get me...it'll make him wonder why –"

"My arm is around you? Makes sense, after all he is a father. No different from the rest of them." He shrugged, and as soon as I saw the cruiser I slid away from Jasper. "That's his car?" he asked, kind of amused by the fact that I had to ride in a police car. With my Dad.

I nodded, and he chuckled. "Well, I would like to say that that's unusual...but it's not. Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow."

My Dad blew the horn. "Hurry up Bella!"

I looked at him. "Coming!" I called back. I turned back to Jasper. "Is it too early to ask for a hug?" I asked.

He chuckled. "No, not at all." He walked towards me and hugged me, and I returned the gesture. "It's not too early at all. I'm just nicer than any of these yahoos," he whispered in my ear, followed by a chuckle. He let go quickly after he said that, probably remembering that he was facing the direction my Dad was in when he hugged me.

"Bye, Jasper!" I called as I ran to the cruiser. When I strapped in, my father looked at me with curiosity.

"What?" I asked, shrugging.

"How did you get a boyfriend that fast, Bells?" he asked with a chuckle

I gasped. "Dad! You know I have no intentions on being in a relationship with someone!" I exclaimed. After I said that, I clamped my hand over my mouth. My Dad always told me I was like my mother in that way.

He laughed, almost running a red light. "Bella, god, I love it when you do that!" I still laughed, tears falling from his eyes, and he was grabbing his stomach.

"Dad...do I need to drive?" I asked, chuckling.

He stopped laughing and turned to me, a serious expression on his face. "Bella, what do you want me to do? Go to jail? I'm already the –"

"Yes, Daddy I know. But guess what?"

He sighed as he drove the car still. "What?"

"What." I smiled, tricking him in the same, monotonous joke. He smiled back.

"I love you too, kid," he said, tussling my hair a bit.

-x-

A/N: Well, that's for you all. School tomorrow...good news is that I'M WELL ENOUGH TO GO BACK!! YAY!!...review please.


	6. Seeing My Mother

A/N: Sorry everyone my brother was in the hospital...so you know how it goes well anyway...here's chappie 6: Seeing my mother.

Decode (Acoustic), Paramore

-x-

Sunday. _Gladly _we didn't have church. Instead, we went to my mother's grave like I asked. We pulled into the cemetery, watching all of the headstones pass by us slowly. He parked and we got out, returning a wave to the owner of the place, Peter.

"Come to see Renee?" he asked.

My Dad shook his head. "No actually...Bella is. Today's her birthday."

Mr. Peter looked at me and smiled. He bent down to my level and softly placed a hand on my shoulder. "This was what you asked for?" I just nodded. He chuckled sadly. "Boy I tell ya, you were always a good kid. How old are you now?"

"Ten," I said softly.

"Wow, you're growing up big, Bella," he said, trying to sound enthusiastic. All of the adults did that. Try to encourage you, when they're really don't care.

"That wasn't funny, Mr. Peter. It's not fun getting older, and it's not fun coming here to a bunch of dead people. I'm not five anymore. Please stop treating me like it."

I turned on my heel and walked to the direction of my mother's grave. I heard them picking up conversation in the back. What Mr. Peter did wasn't funny. I know he wouldn't do that to my Dad, talking to him like a five year old. All of a sudden, it made me feel un-special.

I walked slowly to the bronze headstone with my mother's picture on it. We took it while she was laughing; a joke my Dad told us just before I was left with Mr. Peter so they could go to the Motorcycle Convention...or something like that. But that was while they were driving when the accident happened.

I smiled sadly at the picture though. With her head thrown back, her eyes squeezed shut, and her mouth wide open in a big smile. She looked so happy and at peace with the world at that moment.

Above that it said, "A Mother, a sister, and a wife," and below that it stated her full name: Renee Higgenbotham Swan. It was always kind of funny to me, because she never had a middle name...or I just never knew if she had one.

Below her picture had how long she been alive. You know, what year she was born and what year she died. 1967 – 2005.

"Mom," I started, but I sighed and broke down on my knees and cried. It was so much to handle, so much to talk about and she wasn't here. I just wish I was down there with her, dead with her, so I could still be with her.

But I can't.

_**ChPOV**_

She turned on her heel quickly, and walked to Renee's grave. I felt so sorry for the kid, losing her mother only when she's six.

"She's just a little upset," I reassured Peter quickly.

He shook his head, disagreeing with me. "I'm worried about her, Charles. She's like a granddaughter to me. I can't let her break down. I've known her since she was born, and you _know_ I love her."

I sighed and bowed my head. He was there when Renee had Bella. Just a couple of good friends, you know? "Yeah Peter. I can't stand seeing her like this. It almost makes me die a little inside." I watched as she slowly approached the grave, and she smiled. I smiled. Peter smiled.

He patted my shoulder. "You're doing good, son. She looks very happy that she's here to see her smile again." He chuckled and said, "Boy that joke you told was a killer, Charles. I remember that day as clear as water."

_Just in our twenties; that's the way we loved it. I kissed again, and yet again, and she giggled. I was crazy in love with this woman. I don't know how I could let her go._

"_Daddy, Daddy, tell the joke again!" Bella exclaimed. My little six year old, adorable, Bella. You'd think she was about sixteen by the way she cooks!_

"_Okay, okay," I said, chuckling. "Knock, knock."_

"_Who's there?" Bella and Renee asked anxiously. I heard Peter laughed in the kitchen behind us._

"_You."_

"_You who?"_

"_Yoohoo!" I tried to say in a sing song way, but my voice broke. Declaring that I couldn't sing. Renee threw her head back and started laughing. That's when Peter snapped a picture of her. The old man loved snapping pictures of random things that turned out beautiful. He took one of Bella also, in the same state her mother was in._

_Peter turned his camera off, chuckling. "I hope you didn't get one of me, Peter."_

"_Oh trust me, I did." He raised his eyebrows, and my jaw fell. He laughed too, almost falling back in his chair. "No! Dammit, Charlie I wouldn't do that. You would break the lens before I even think about it."_

"_Haha," I said sarcasticly._

"_No seriously, go have fun at the Harley Davidson Convention. Be safe. You too Renee. You both _are _young and wreckless after all. They should've named that soap opera The Young of the Wreckless. That's what they are."_

"_Yes Peter, we will be safe." She walked over to Bella and gave her a kiss on the forehead. "You behave for Mr. Peter, okay?"_

_She nodded her little head. "Okay Mommy. Love you." She gave her a big hug, and then came over to me and hugged me around the waist. "Love you Daddy."_

_The way she said that almost make my heart burst. "Love you too, kid." I tussled her hair, and she giggled. She always loved it when I do that. "Well we gotta get going. Later Peter."_

"_Bye Peter," Renee said, and then she waved._

"_Bye the both of you. Remember, be careful."_

"_Always am," Me and Renee said at the same exact time. We chuckled and walked out of the house, closing the door behind us._

_She drew her hood up from under her leather jacket, and then put on her purple helmet. "Are we gonna make it in time? You know I really wanna go. Irina is gonna be there." She hopped on the back of the motorcycle while I put on my shiny, red helmet._

"_Yeah I know. I hope we can, though." I got on the motorcycle and revved the engine, then slowly let go of the clutch. As we rode, the bike bucked a little._

"_Charlie, did you feel that? What was that?"_

Boy I forgot how much she worried, _I thought. "Calm down Renee. It's probably just the road."_

_Then it bucked again, then it kind of jumped. "Charlie! What _was _that?!"_

"_Renee it's the road." Then it swerved. Thing everything just went by to fast. I tried to brake, but I couldn't. "I don't know what's wrong with it!" I admitted._

"_Char –!"_

" –lie!" a voice said, bringing me back to the present. I blinked, dazed by my unconscious but awakened state.

I blinked, and then turned my attention to Peter and Bella. "You alright?" Peter asked with a worried tone and expression. Then I looked at Bella, who was staring at me wide eyed with a frowned up face.

I shook my head. I had to be honest. "No."

-x-

A/N: Hoped you liked it. As you know, Bella's birthday is on September 13th. I just thought you'd like that little entry. So...review? Thnx. x)


	7. Knocked off course

A/N: I'm so sorry everyone...I have a brother...obviously...and I take care of him more than my own Mother does...and I was grounded...still am, so if the chappie's start taking longer, I'm on punishment or on the airplane...but other than that I hope you enjoy this chappie xP

_**MEGA ATTENTION!: **_** I will be changing the summary soon...or probably not. Still thinking...ALSO! I would like a Beta, so if you're interested, please message or review. THANKS!**

_**MEGA MEGA ATTENTION!:::::: **_** Since I'm making a really big move from Virginia to California, I'm not gonna be able to post my chappies... x[ BUT I will be typing them while there is no internet...I'm really sorry everyone...next post probably won't be until July or end of June.**

Song: Resistance, Muse

-x-

**BPOV**

The next Monday was good...and bad also.

Good because I hung out with Jasper and his friends and siblings. Turns out that Edward is a lot smarter than the way he talks, and that Emmett is fun to be around. Rosalie always has an attitude with everyone, even me! Although I have no idea what I could have possibly done wrong. Alice is fun to be with, too. She loves shopping, and drawing pattern ideas for clothes...or _drawing the clothes._

It was bad because a girl named Lauren bumped into me, and accused me of being unaware of my surroundings.

"Just make sure you watch where your ugly, deformed self walks, you got that?" She walked away with her friends after she said this, and I almost cried. But I told myself to save the tears for later.

But that whole week, Lauren and her friends always pointed and giggled at me, whispering to one another and staring straight at me. I'd always bow my head and try to ignore them, because they'd say the words so good that you can see it float off of their lips.

On Friday when I sat down, Jasper noticed what was wrong with me. He knew it was Her.

"Listen," he began, looking really serious, talking with his hands business-like. "don't listen to them. They're wrong. They're just jealous because I always hang out with you. But seriously," he continued, "they're like that because they see me with you all the time. I don't really care for a girlfriend. Something could happen, and then you can't do anything about it except for break up, you know?"

I nodded, understanding his long speech.

That's when the bell rang and we got up and dumped our trays.

We then left the Cafeteria and walked up and down the halls.

"Jasper...can I ask you something, although it's kinda personal?"

He looked at me questionably, with one eyebrow arched above his eye. "Well...depends on what the question is that you're trying to ask."

I looked down to escape his glare, and sighed. He would say yes. I _know _he will say yes. "It's about me, actually."

I didn't know if he was looking at me or not, and I didn't wanna know.

"Okay...?" he said, prolonging the "o" and the "kay". He sounded unsure about this.

"Okay, um...am I..._ugly_ to you?" I asked hesitantly. I definitely felt him looking at me.

"Why would you ask that?" he asked.

"Because...I can trust you. Even though it's been like a week, I feel that you're my best friend. Like you're the _only _person in this mean school that I can talk to."

I looked to see him staring. He looked a bit touched by what I said. "Why, Bella? Why would you think that about yourself? Every living thing on this Earth is beautiful. But...you shouldn't give a damn about your appearance for other people."

I frowned. I shouldn't...? "But what if I..._do _give a..._damn_ about my appearance?"

As soon as he opened his mouth, the bell rang. He sighed and hugged me. "I'll see you later," he whispered in my ear before walking towards his hall.

-x-

I walked out of the classroom with my tote and purse, kind of searching for Jasper. I didn't see him, so I kept on walking. While I was walking, though, his arm slipped around my waist.

"I'm thinking about giving you my number," he said to me. "Though, a girl calling my house. I'm not even allowed to have a girlfriend. It might be a bad look...but I don't care. Here." His hand stuck out in front of me, holding a white piece of paper. We were outside now.

"Thanks," I said, blushing.

He snickered and said, "You're welcome. So, this movie that's out right now, Clash of the Titans. Me and my brothers and sister are going to see it, along with Rosalie –"

The cruiser's horn honked.

"– and I was wondering if you wanted to see it."

I bowed my head. "But I'd be the outcast of the group."

He sighed, frustrated, and cupped my cheek with his hand. "Bella," he started, his face dangerously close to mine. "_you are _beautiful. The most beautiful girl _I've _ever seen, okay? I like you – a lot – and I don't want this year to be awkward for you; I want you to feel comfortable. I understand if I'm expressing my emotions to you _too_ early, but you have to know about the way I feel."

"Bella, c'mon! I have to be to work!"

I sighed, and then snorted. "You're just saying that to make me feel better; no one wants me."

He looked at me with a horrified expression. "Don't say that," he said, shaking his head.

I sighed again. He just couldn't comprehend with me, could he? "I have to go. Bye Jasper." I gave him a hug, and then ran back to the cruiser.

Once I got inside, my Dad stared at me with that same, curious look I get everyday after school.

"Are you _sure _he's not your boyfriend?" he asked.

"_Daddy_," I groaned. "Why do you want me to have a boyfriend so much?"

"I _don't. _That's the thing. I think you're dating behind my back."

I sighed. "Daddy, I would never do that."

He looked at me from the corner of his eye. "Okay," he said, shifting in his seat.

After what was about ten minutes, we pulled into the driveway of the small, two story house. As I got out I asked, "How long do I have to stay here?"

He sighed as he fidgeted with the keys on the key ring. "I should be back by nine...you don't mind staying here by yourself? I mean...you are pretty young." He opened the door and walked inside, and I followed after, breathing in the scent of the house: peppermint, crayons and dishwater.

I took off my coat and threw it on the arm of the couch and jumped onto the cushions. "Yeah Daddy. I'll watch Spongebob or whatever, a movie to pass the time and call...call my friend. Play some games on the Wii..." I trailed off and shrugged.

"Um..." he scratched behind his ear...as if he was unsure or nervous...or just itchy. "okay well... I love you, Bells." He walked over to me and kissed my forehead.

"Love you too, Dad." I hugged him, and then he was gone.

So, my schedule went as planned.

I watched two blocks of spongebob; watched a movie called The Notebook, which was very sad; when I got hungry, I made so Ramen Oddles and Noodles; after I ate, I played the Wii, and lost about five pounds on the Wii fit; and then _finally, _by the time I called Jasper, it was about seven o'clock.

At eight, I told him I'll speak to him another time, because I had to get ready for bed.

So, I went to my room – which was _drowned _in purple and pink – and got out some underwear and pajamas. Then I showered.

For about thirty minutes.

The water felt _so good _against my skin, until it started getting cold. I wrapped myself and hair in a towel, and walked into my room. When I walked in...something seemed different; off.

There was a strange smell in here...it wasn't here before, though. Its was a musky smell; like beer and cigarettes and dirty drawers.

Suddenly, my my lamp was out, and I heard someone laughing softly, menacingly. _A strange man was in my room._

I couldn't see a thing, so I just went to where I thought my bed to be, and I plopped down on it, backing up to the headboard.

I saw the man's figure climbing on my bed, coming toward me. He climbed above me, his knee in between my thighs and his hot breath on my face.

I was do scared. I wish my Daddy could get off early. I wish nine o'clock could come faster... I didn't know what to expect if this happened to me. As much as I've seen it on TV, I didn't imagine it to happen to me...

I was sobbing now, tear uncontrollably strolling down my cheeks. "Who are you? What do you want? Please, I'm only nine." I pleaded through sobs.

"Don't tell _anyone _what I'm about to do, and you're free." the scary voice said.

All I could do is nod, because all I wanted was for my life to be on track.

But...after this night...will it _stay on track?_

A/N:...I understand if some of you are dissappointed...but I promise I will make it up to you.

Love you all!


	8. AUTHOR'S NOTE

Dear lovelies,

It will be a while before this story moves on. I have went on and made other story(ies), which will soon be posted. I apologize for the inconvenience, but also hope you enjoy other story(ies) I post.

Thanks yous,  
Denial.


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